Happy Thanksgiving!
I have off work today, which I like to think is because my boss knew it was Thanksgiving in the US, though probably it was actually just a coincidence. And yes, I’ll be making a little Norwegian version of a Thanksgiving dinner and celebrating the day, though not necessarily because Thanksgiving is my favorite, but more so because after Thanksgiving it’s officially acceptable to start listening to Christmas music 24/7 and that IS my favorite!
Um, can I be real for a second though? I’ve always been a huge fan of Christmas – to the point of forcing my friends to make paper snowflakes with me and dance around to Norwegian Christmas songs they don’t understand the words to – but as I’ve gotten deeper into this whole adulthood thing I feel like there’s this new weight that’s bringing the magic of Christmas down just a smidge.
Because while the holidays are still a whole lot about love and family and cheer and glitter and sweets, it also feels juuuust a bit like the time of year when my extended family checks in on me and is basically like, nope, Silvia still doesn’t have her life together.
I mean, they’re right.
I’m super proud of the fact that I’ve finally chosen a country I want to call home, but maybe not everyone sees that as the biggest accomplishment for a 28 year old. And maybe the same goes for working part-time at a supermarket and talking like a toddler most of the time (Norwegian is hard, guys!).
I have some extended family in my area and sometimes they come to the shop and are really sweet and friendly, but they also always ask how much longer I’m planning on working at a supermarket. And then they start talking about how smart and talented my mother always was and how wonderful it is that she’s now a professor and isn’t my sister a writer? And I’m like, I get it, I’m so behind in life.
Though when it comes to those family holiday parties I can at least rely on my ever loyal parents to come to my rescue. My dad will swoop in and tell Aunt Marge that actually, his youngest daughter is a writer! And her face will light up and she’ll ask me if I write academic pieces like my dad or novels like my sister.
And I’ll give her a big smile in the hopes that it will fool her into thinking I’m delivering good news and tell her that, well, I write blog posts!
Lol.
Except the sort of lol where the laughter is actually just trying to mask a sob.
The truth is no, I still don’t know what I want to do when I grow up. I don’t even know what field I want to work in, or if I want to have a career at all, or if I want to get married and have kids, or if I’d rather get a dog instead (I mean, obviously I want to get a dog, but will I ever be able to handle the responsibility??) or if I’ll live in Rauland forever or move somewhere else in Norway, or if I’ll ever be able to speak fluent Norwegian.
Basically I don’t have answers to any of the questions Aunt Marge is going to ask me this holiday season.
Maybe next year!
(But probably not.)
The Seven Best Norwegian Christmas Cookies (+ Recipes)
Charlotte says
Man I really hate how modern society is all about having a career and being successful. And if you found a way of life that makes YOU happy but isn’t “standard” people are SO judgemental!
Me myself, I’m a musician and blogger and try my hardest to make a living from selling stock music and ads on my blog. But family don’t get it, because that kind of “work” didn’t exist 10 years ago. They still ask me if I “have a job already”.
I think it’s awesome that you live to be happy and put the things you love above having a career. Supermarket cashiers are important too! Keep on blogging, I hope to read a whole lot more from you!
Silvia says
Ooh that sounds really interesting! But yeah, I think some people will just never get it.
Nick says
Your aunt Marge sounds a lot like my cousin, Brenda. Get off my case, Brenda!
Silvia says
Ughhh Brenda!
lucia says
You are not alone! i’m 30, and i still havent chose a country to stay hahahaha let’s resist together in this way of living!
Silvia says
Yesss love it!
Nynke says
I have a career in academia, but I’ve been in temporary contracts for years and I’m always afraid of being pushed out by other, hotter researchers… And this is exactly the kind of thing I get reminded of and need to explain over the holidays. So not festive! So I sympathise with you. A lot. Good luck! And what matters is that what you do is worthwhile to you, not that you can explain it and sound solid and dependable and traditional…
Silvia says
Ugh, not festive at all! It does seem like some people just won’t get it, so I need to try not to worry about them.
Gerlinde says
Love how you put that into words. If you can support yourself and be happy with your job, why would you try desperately to do something else? The way society meassures success is very depressing and short sighted. I quit my job in 2012, moved to Norway in 2014. I am a stay at home mom of four. Most of the time, I feel really happy with what I can do and with how little money we can live so there is plenty of time be spent together and make some savings. Other people work 40 hours a week for a salary to have money so they can buy stuff to be happy. I find my way more practical, but I will never be considered succesful. Which is not a problem at all for me. Let them judge 🙂
Silvia says
Your life sounds pretty ideal to me! Sometimes I do get small panics over going a different route, but mostly I think for me it has been a really good thing.
Maren says
Thank you, thank you, thank you – from one 28-year-old to another! I feel so much better now! (Not to be the only one… and we should be allowed to do and be whatever we want, whenever we want, wherever we want! <3
Silvia says
Yesss I love hearing that I’m not alone!
Van @ Snow in Tromso says
Hey, I’ve seen you on the list for NBE so you’re pretty much living my dream right now! Don’t let people who don’t get it tell you where you should be in your life. All this “you should be married, have kids and a career by 30” crap is so old. I mean if there’s one generation who has all the opportunities to change the rules, it’s ours 😉
Silvia says
Haha that’s funny, because your life sounds pretty dreamy to me! And I love that attitude – it really is so true!
Alaina says
I saw your post on GLT!
I literally just fell in love with your blog, omg. Subscribing right now. But anyway… totally connect with you when you said you found a place you want to call your own. I just traveled to London, and I KNOW that’s where I’m meant to be… but no one else seems as proud of me as I am 😉
Alaina | http://www.pumpsandpineapples.com
Silvia says
Loove GLT! And congrats on finding that place – especially in London, what a cool place to live!
Adriana says
If it makes you feel better I have so much admiration for your blog. I can see over time how your photography has progressed and you’re one of the most followed travel blogs on the internet. I only hope to follow in similar footsteps some day.
Silvia says
Wow, way to melt my heart! Totally what I needed to hear in preparation for confronting Aunt Marge!
McKenzie Allyshia says
I think the real question is, do we ever truly know what we want to do with our lives? I am at a point where I feel like I am as adult as it gets, but I still have no idea what I want to do. I’m a mom going to college full time while working full time, and I still have no idea what to do with my life. So, to your wonderful Aunt Marge, no one really knows what they want to do with their life 😉
Happy Thanksgiving ♥
Silvia says
Looove that! And that’s what I’ll tell her 🙂
chewy says
I feel you! We don’t get together with our extended family that much, but my mom insists on asking me about my love life every few weeks. It’s not like a new boyfriend is going to pop out of the woodworks just like that! Hope you enjoyed your Thanksgiving! It’s definitely my favorite holiday.
Silvia says
Haha right? It makes me laugh when family hope that my life has magically sorted itself.
Leah says
HA! I’m fairly certain that no matter how much we get “figured out” there will always be more things to “figure out.” I can already see the domino effect of things that will happen in my future as soon as I get the next thing “figured out.” Oh, I know where I want to live? Sweet, now make more money. I’m making more money? Sweet, now get an accountant. And how about some health insurance while you’re at it. Oh, you have those things? Time to get married and at least, like, get a cat or something. SOUNDS FUN GUYS.
Silvia says
Lol get a cat, Leah! But seriously, that’s so true – if we’re constantly worrying about completing the next step, all we’re ever going to be doing is worrying.
Chiera says
Did I write this? I feel like this post has come directly from my brain! (minus the Thanksgiving stuff cause I’m Scottish…but you get what I mean) The plans I have for my life so far are my travels. Moving away. Exploring the world. I genuinely cannot see past it! I have no idea if and when I will make it back home. I have zero clue as so what I want my ‘career’ to be, or if I even want one! Why does it have to just be ONE thing forever? I absolutely love reading posts like this and realising I’m not the only one!
Silvia says
It does sound like we are maybe the same person. Love it!
Kellie says
I know that feel. Actually, my family has died off a bit asking the typical questions. I think partly because they just don’t want to hear the awful news again. A lot of my family thought I was going to be settled into a solid career with a decent salary after college (I do enjoy the comforts of a home and some routine). Nope. Kellie’s off slinging tacos and living in a van and now she’s moving to Alaska? Yeah, well, she’s alive. So cheers to that.
But I also like to think that some of the family really do get it. The living outside societal norm thing, ya know?
Silvia says
Your life sounds like a storybook! Totally better than that salary and home.
Marlies says
I know exactly how you feel. I also have no idea what to do with my life but I make money and travel and right now that makes me happy but apparently my family doesn’t believe that.
I’m single and yesterday my sister in law asked me why I don’t use tinder or should think about speed dating. I don’t care about a boyfriend right now so why should she? I am so over those questions.
Silvia says
Ugh right? I guess some people just have a hard time understanding that we don’t share their priorities!
Michelle says
Story of my life! Don’t worry, I’m 32 and still don’t have my “life” sorted out yet. I can tick a full time job, and yearly travel off my list; but in terms of marriage, kids, pets, house…. nope. I don’t even understand why those things mean that our lives are sorted, but thanks to society, if we don’t have that planned out then we’re wasting time. At least there are so many of us out there, breaking the mold! Be proud of what you’ve achieved, and just do what makes you happy 🙂
Silvia says
I do love seeing how many different paths people out there have chosen!
Aunt Hege says
Ah! The dilemma of the square boxes and the people who love them! I think most people will agree that the world cannot “sustain on square boxes alone” (at least it will be a lot less fun and interesting). Yes, I also have relatives exactly like that who wants to put everyone in the same box, and perhaps that validate their own choices, or maybe they just like everyone in their predictable places: it’s neat and clean and calming. If you don’t have sea legs, it’s exhausting to be in a rocking boat, right? One Norwegian newspaper called you Telemark’s new ambassador and it said you had 80 000 readers! I would say you have planted yourself solidly and successfully in a different box. Rock on, baby girl, the world is looking at you, kid.
Silvia says
Haha we get it, Aunt Hege, you’re not Aunt Marge! No, it’s only really more distant relatives that give me a hard time, which makes it easier for me to just roll my eyes at them.
Victoria @The British Berliner says
Ach! No worries! By the time I was 30, I had lived in 4 different countries as an expat, had studied Political Science at university, and wasn’t doing anything remotely connected to it. I wasn’t married, I didn’t have any children or a boyfriend that lived in the same country, never mind the same city! And, I was seriously thinking of moving to Hong Kong! Oh, and did I tell you that I’m the only girl in my family. Gulp!
Well, it sorted itself out in the end. I’m married and just about had the child (everybody had frankly given up lol)! However, I still live abroad as an expat, I still travel the world, and I still haven’t used the BSc Political Science that I got. I also changed fields from Project Management to Inter-Cultural Corporate Coaching to Head of School. And now I’m into journalislm and media stuff on German TV.
Just the other week I received a Xmas invitation from the office of the President of the Federal Goverment of Germany. You really couldn’t make it up!
Silvia says
Lol your life is CRAZY! I hope I accumulate so many different badges 🙂
Brian says
The best path in life is the one that makes YOU happy, even if it twists and turns and has a few dead ends. I just “discovered” your blog and within its digital pages I see a smiling, happy person who is enjoying life.
Peter says
Dear Silvia,
Why don’t you study Eurythmy?