People often ask me what my favorite country to visit has been, and I never quite know what to say. There are so many wonderful places in the world! A question that I sadly find much easier is about my least favorite country. The answer? Bulgaria.
I visited Bulgaria’s coast at the end of my senior year of high school with Thomas and Birgitta, a German couple I had been living with for the year as an exchange student. I can’t remember the name of the town we stayed in, but it was full of half-built hotels and mansions and just seemed depressing.
Then again, that’s what a lot of the Albanian coast looks like and Albania is one of my favorite countries ever. So what’s the deal?
The deal is, my issue with Bulgaria really has nothing to do with Bulgaria at all. Instead, it has to do with that one dinner where I asked my host parents how they thought my German was and my host mother sighed and said that, well actually, she was incredibly disappointed by how little I had learned.
I still feel a pain at the back of my throat just thinking about her words, which is funny because that was Birgitta’s most gentle reprimand of the evening.
My host parents went on to tell me that they were disappointed in pretty much everything I had done during my year in Germany, from how quiet I was when I first arrived (because I didn’t speak any German yet) to the way that I always super annoyingly would greet Thomas at the bottom of the stairs when he got home from work to talk about how his day was. Kids are such a pain.
More confessions ensued, which led to a lot of sulking and despair on my part, a day trip to Istanbul that had me fleeing the Hagia Sophia in tears only to get lost in a bazaar and finally make it back to my apparently unconcerned host parents within minutes of our bus’s departure for Bulgaria, and a sit-down back in Germany where they told me that I could stay with them for my remaining two weeks in the country, but they would like me to find my own way to the airport and once I left could I please never write to them, call them, or visit, because they never wanted to see me again.
I moved to my friend’s house that afternoon.
The worst part was that up until Bulgaria I had thought we had had a wonderful year together, which raised the chilling question: How many other people in my life also secretly hated spending time with me?
It took me a long time, as well as no longer being a self-absorbed teenager, to realize that my host parents’ complaints had seemed so unexpected and downright strange (like when they said I was a typical American with zero interest in other cultures) because their real problem probably had very little to do with me at all. I like to think that I hope that they are happier together now, but let’s be real: I’m not quite that mature yet. Like, maybe when I’m 30.
I am, however, mature enough to admit when I’m wrong.
I was wrong about Bulgaria.
Bulgaria was a last-minute addition to Dan and my itinerary, squeezed in when we heard that Dan’s best friend and former partner in rockstar glory (I’m dead if Dan sees that link, but I think it’s worth the risk) had just bought a house for 5 thousand pounds in Bulgaria and would be working on it all summer.
I guess I am a clueless American, because apparently buying cheap property in Bulgaria is now a thing? A really cool thing by the looks of it – I can’t wait to see how Matt’s place turns out when he’s done with it!
Matt’s new house is in a village named Idilevo, just outside of Veliko Tarnovo. And from the moment we arrived, thoroughly exhausted from our long journey from Albania, I knew I was in love. Not with the village – or Matt (awkward!) – but with Veliko Tarnovo. I mean, Idilevo and Matt are both really cool, but it was Veliko Tarnovo that truly stole my heart.
Yes it’s annoying that its name makes me crave apple turnovers, but the city is just so cool!
Set on the side of a hill, Veliko Tarnovo is full of tiny winding alleys that always seem to lead to beautiful lookout points. It’s not exactly off the tourist path, but more like a stop on one of the cooler legs of backpackers’ Euro trips. Before camping out at Matt’s place we spent a few nights at Hostel Mostel and I just loved the laid back, almost lazy atmosphere there (plus they serve free breakfast AND dinner!).
I think it was one of my all-time favorite hostels, and definitely worth booking early so you can stay there! Check current rates and availability here
Of course I couldn’t really love a city if it didn’t come with any quirks, but Veliko Tarnovo happily complied with its beautiful and strange street murals, and an array of bizarrely camp statues.
Veliko Tarnovo also happens to be just a few hours from Buzludzha, which despite having me shaking in my hiking boots for most of our exploration of its eerie ruins, was probably the single coolest site I visited on this five-month journey. I can’t wait to write about it, but seeing as I’ve already bored you all to death with ramblings about my teenage woes, I’ll save that for next time and just say that it was amazing, and so Bulgaria is amazing. Read about my trip to Buzludzha here
As for my host family, perhaps the end to my year with them gave me an unhealthy dose of self-doubt, but I really couldn’t be more grateful for the experience. I got to spend a year in Hüfingen, which simply must be the most beautiful town in the Black Forest, I cycled to school each day along the Danube – in fact my high school was just a kilometer away from the source of the Danube, I lived next door to a girl who is still one of my dearest friends, and I learned just how important it is for us humans to lead lives we can be proud of and happy in.
Have you ever changed your mind about a place?
Linda says
This part made me gigge! – “Yes it’s annoying that its name makes me crave apple turnovers” Haha! I haven’t been to Bulgaria yet but Veliko Tarnovo looks pretty cool 🙂
Silvia says
It really is so cool!
Ola says
I’m so shocked reading about your host family!
Silvia says
Ha ugh, people sometimes!
Mary B says
Like you said – it’s not you, it’s them. My experience with host families in several countries has taught me that some of them are in it for a chance to learn about another culture and teach someone about their own; and some of them are in it for the money they get for hosting someone. I had a host family in the Dominican Republic that barely spoke to me, acted like I was being super dramatic when I asked for more toilet paper, and fed me really basic food – just papaya for breakfast, and tortillas and beans for dinner – even though I know they got paid well enough to feed me more substantial meals. On the other hand, my host family in Honduras welcomed me back every Sunday for family supper even once I had my own place, planned a huge feast when my mom came to visit, and have become real family to me.
I’m glad you were able to go back to Bulgaria and cleanse the memories of the previous trip!
Silvia says
Oh wow, it sounds like you had a much rougher experience with host families than I did! Though your family in Honduras sounds like a dream 🙂
Caitlin says
I went on a weekend trip to Bulgaria while I was studying abroad in Istanbul and it ended up being one of my favorite trips from that semester! Though I definitely had low expectations for it and was prepared for the grey, boring, cold I’d come to associate with the style of the former USSR. Aside from being my first taste of pork products in months (which makes it a winner automatically), I was completely surprised at how colorful, fun, and friendly it was. I saw Sofia and Plovdiv but I can only imagine how cool the smaller cities and towns are. Glad it changed your mind! 🙂
Nick says
Great story – Bulgaria is high on my list pretty much because of Buzludzha! Can’t wait to hear more about your time there.
Also boo to your host family. Great that you see the silver lining in everything tho!
Lauren Bishop says
Oh my goodness! That story about your host family is shocking. I think you are brave and extreme resilient not to loose your love of travel after such an unpleasant experience when you were young.
Camille says
What the… what was wrong with those people?! They clearly had issues… and well, erm, maybe a bit German of them too to expect perfection and be so blunt and judgmental?! Glad you managed to rise above it, and that you got to give Bulgaria a second chance 🙂
Silvia says
Hahaha those Germans! I really think they were just having some issues at the time and sort of accidentally took it out on me. I mean, having a teenager around couldn’t exactly have been easy…
becky hutner says
I am horrified by your host family!! I hope they see this & feel deeply ashamed. Turns out their American charge who cared so little about other cultures has now been to like every country on earth! Dicks.
Silvia says
Ha at the time I had been so tempted to point out that at 17 I had already traveled way more than them but I didn’t. Now it’s just one of those things I wish I had said!
Deepti @ Endless Postcards says
I can’t imagine somebody saying such terrible things to a teenager, especially one that’s living in a new country and at a disadvantage. How horrible! I’m glad you got to see Bulgaria in a better light with better people. Lovely photos!
xo, endlesspostcards.com
Silvia says
It was SO nice to have a more positive experience of Bulgaria – I feel like in a way it wiped away those bad memories.
Allison says
I also did a gap year in Germany, and had some major awkward beef (like you, I wasn’t aware of any of it) with my host parents. So much for the Germans being direct, huh?
Anyways, I’m lad you were able to make some new memories in Bulgaria! It looks lovely!
Allison
http://www.headelsewhere.com
Silvia says
Right?? When my host parents were going on about me I asked them if they thought they were direct (wish they were always super proud about being) and then why they hadn’t said anything to me earlier and they were just silent. So strange. I guess being an exchange student is a pretty strange experience though!
Amy says
I’ve changed my mind about a place too — and it was also Bulgaria! Specifically Sofia. We arrived in rainy Sofia after three vibrant, sunny days in Istanbul. We got there early in the morning, and since not everything was opened up yet, it seemed like a cold, reserved place. I started worrying that the rest of our trip (Bulgaria and Romania) wouldn’t be able to live up to the amazing time I had had in Istanbul.
Luckily, after the rainy clouds cleared and we were able to walk around a little more, I found that Sofia really opened up. It is such a wonderful place, full of history and quirks — I loved that they had turned a police watch tower into a picnic gazebo!
We went to Veliko Tarnovo afterwards and stayed in a hotel with a swoon-worthy view over the valley and fortress ruins. I was completely won over. I’m glad you also had a second chance with Bulgaria!
Silvia says
Oh wow, that’s so crazy! I’m glad we both learned to love Bulgaria in the end!
Victoria@ The British Berliner says
Wow! What an interesting story. And how unispiring your host family must have been. I’m grossly disappointed that they could be so cruel to a child under their care. I’ll say no more being that my husband is Germand and I have a half-German, half British kid!
Having said that, I’m looking forward to going to Bulgaria either sometime this year or the next as Slovenia, Luxembourg or France might tip the scales instead..!
p.s. How simple was it to go from Bulgaria to Turkey? Did you drive or use public transport?
Silvia says
We took a bus to Istanbul from Bulgaria – I can’t really remember the details, but I think it was pretty easy!
Richelle says
Wow! That is a crazy and horribly upsetting story about your host family. I can’t imagine hearing all that after staying with your family for a year and thinking there was nothing wrong. They obviously should not have been host parents. Why did they feel the need to bring up all that stuff anyway if there was only a few weeks left? Bizarre. I could understand if their issues were legitimate and easily solved, like you coming back super late or blasting loud music. But “you’re annoying” is not something you tell a teenager.
Brea says
That story about your host family is horrendous! I wouldn’t know what to do in that situation….well, probably cry a lot.
Silvia says
Haha yup, there were lots of tears!
Olga says
Hi, Silvia!
I’m really sorry for your bad experience with the host family… but as a Bulgarian I have to say that you definitely should change the title of your article, because it creates wrong negative expectations about the country and the post is actually not about Bulgaria…or it has not much to do with the country.
Silvia says
I’m sorry the title upset you! As you said though, if you read the post it is very clear that this had nothing to do with Bulgaria. I chose this title on purpose because I think judging a country based on other circumstances happens all the time and it IS a problem, and I wanted to highlight that. This time I absolutely loved Bulgaria!
Olga says
Nice to hear it 🙂 Welcome back again 🙂
Yordan K says
Having lived in Bulgaria for many years I can assure you that Veliko Turnovo is one of the best towns in this country. Much more peaceful than big cities like Sofia, Plovdiv or even the town where I lived – Burgas. So you did really good choice to buy property near it. I would do the same if I ever decide to continue living there. too bad you didn’t include more pictures of the area. It really is very beautiful, but at least in the Buzdludja post you have a great picture of the Balkan mountains. Anyway, very interesting article, also because you started with something personal. I really liked it 🙂
Denis says
Wow! What a story. It seems like your host family had their own issues and dumped their negative energy on you.
Veliko Tarnovo is awesome tho! I’m originally from Bulgaria, but grew up in Massachusetts like you. If you ever go back to Bulgaria visit the 7 Rila Lakes. Absolutely stunning! The Rila Lakes look like Norway so you’ll probably like it a lot.
I recently discovered your website btw as I was trying to figure out how to get from Bergen to the Lofoten Islands. Do you think 5 days is enough to see Bergen and travel to Lofoten? Or maybe I should stay around Bergen? I wanna hike Lofoten, but I think I’d be pretty happy kayaking around the fjords in Bergen too.
Thank you for all of your information on your website. Very helpful and inspiring.
Albanian cities says
Great Article. Also visit Tirana in Albania. Is one of the most dynamic places you will visit. Both daylife and nightlife are filled with numerous things to do
Deyan says
Sylvia, could you please, emphasize in your post about your trip to Bulgaria, that you had a not so good experience with some Bulgarian family, and that is nothing to do with the whole country of Bulgaria! It is like me coming to Norway, and living with some family for awhile, and having a bad experience, claiming after that that Norway is my least favored country to visit, just because of my experience with few Norwegians. That in Psychology is called ‘generalizing’ which means, putting everything together the good and bad in one category and saying everything is bad.
I am from Bulgaria, from a Black Sea resort in Bulgaria, where we have many Scandinavians every summer, and I know a young man from Norway, who graduated from the Oslo University, and now he is living in one village in Bulgaria, selling his art, and holding art conferences in that village. I saw a documentary program on the TV with him, and he was telling about him adapting to the life in Bulgaria, and trying to live there. He has been there for a few years I think, if I understood it correctly. So he left Norway, in order to live and do Business in Bulgaria, which for me was very surprising…